Ugly Dogs vs. Handsome Dogs

I'd like to set the record straight on this dog issue. I see too many people out there with ugly dogs. You can expect teenage girls, the elderly, and women in matching track suits to have ugly dogs. This isn't an excuse, but at least it's a reason. If you are a person with one of the following dogs, shame on you.




By the way, you don't get a special pass for being good looking:


Nor do you get a special pass for being not-good-looking (I apologize for subjecting you to this photo):


Some general rules for ugly dogs: curly hair, super tiny, really long hair.

Handsome dogs (if you own one of these, be proud -- you have a real dog):


There are many more options on both sides, but this should serve as a good primer.

Frak + Ryan Game

Justin and I played this game in class years ago. I introduced it to Frankie at the Curtis' Superbowl Party and he's already posted the ones from his sketchbook. Here are mine!

(The "rules": draw a picture and leave the word balloons blank. Trade with friend.)

Round 1: drawn by Ryan, written by Frankie


Round 2: drawn by Frankie, written by Ryan

Norma Stamper: 1929 - 2009

I've been meaning to write this for a while. My grandmother, my mom's mom, died on December 10, just five days shy of her 80th birthday. Her husband, my grandfather, died a few years back.

I loved my Nana Norma and I miss her. For whatever difficulties and pain she caused our family in the past, she also brought joy and genuine love. My earliest memories are of her gifts, and her giving spirit. She loved giving gifts! Even though some of them were odd, she was thinking of you specifically when she got it.

She was quite a character. Very opinionated about grammar, never failed to correct me when I said something like "me and Josh went to the park." But it was because she knew we were capable of better. She loved John Wayne and classic movies. I still remember her reciting a famous line from Patton, doing her best to mimic George C. Scott. "Rommel, you magnificent bastard, I read your book!" (I can't remember if she actually said "bastard," but that's how the memory plays in my mind.)

The night before she died most of the family was able to visit her. She was slipping in and out of consciousness, but when she saw you, she smiled broadly and squeezed your hand. My cousin Christopher was able to give her the news that he and his wife had just discovered that they were pregnant with a boy. Christopher is the only Stamper grandson, so his forthcoming son will be the first to carry on the Stamper name. She was really excited by this, raising her arms and smiling and saying, "Oh gosh! Oh golly! Gee whiz!" It was a truly joyful moment, and I like to think that the next day she was up in Heaven telling Baba Bill the news.

My grandmother loved the Lord later in her life. And she loved us. I thank God for her and the chance to see her again one day.

Paintballing

Yesterday morning I got to go paintballing with my friends Doug and Hugh, and a couple of Doug's friends. We went to a place called Warped way up by Magic Mountain.

Short version: it was fun, we saw Tom Hanks, I got shot in the back by a teammate at one point.

Long version: it's been 10 years since I last went paintballing. I used to be really into it in high school and early college. Here's a picture of my gun that I dug out of an old website I used to have.

I still have the body somewhere, but I've sold all the parts.

So, with that in mind, it was odd being one of the "new guys" using the crappy rental equipment on a field full of little kids and middle-aged men with $500-$1000 electric guns and gear. We were all armed with Tippmann Model 98s, which came out right around the time I got out of the game. We had smeary, scratchy masks that were difficult to see through. One thing I remember from when I used to play is that any bit of dirt or grime on a paintball affects it's accuracy greatly, so with our rental guns that had dirt and wet paint in the barrel, wet paint in the hopper, and wet paint and dirt in the refill pods, our shots beyond 30 feet were all over the place.

But it was still pretty fun. Our first game took place in The Town, which felt closer in size to a large living room. Two teams start on opposite sides and rush to fill in the little wooden closets. You run all of 10 feet before you have to stop and set up because you're coming under fire. Well, I went left to try and get at their flank, but got nailed right in the mask when I turned a corner. Out in about a minute.

Second game took place in the Spool Field. Our team started at the bottom of the hill. Once again, as the game begins, I run up the left flank and BAM hit by a lucky shot to the mask by someone way up the hill raining pellets on us. Again, out in a minute. As for the rest of our team, Hugh had showed up by this point, and even though it was his first game ever, he and another guy ended up winning the game for our side!

Third game, I think, here we go, gonna be careful this time! We switched sides on the Spool Field, and, again, I take the left side. (I didn't really realize until now that I did this every game.) So I get really far down the left flank, get a good position behind a large spool, and am waiting for an enemy to advance too far and expose himself. Then THAP. What the? I get hit in the back! I'm very confused for a moment. No one could have advanced far enough to hit me in the back without getting shot by the rest of my team. THAP THAP. More shots come. They're bouncing off of me, not breaking, so I'm not calling "out" yet. I look behind me and realize they must be coming from someone on our team! I wave and yell, "I'm on your side! Knock it off!" Then I settle back down and scan the opposing side for enemies. THAP THAP THAP. I'm hit, and they've broken. I call out and move outside of the field. Shot out by some idiot on my own team! I think it was one of these little kids who was playing, but come on. If you can see me clearly and you haven't moved from the back-most cover, I'm on your team. There isn't really an excuse other than stupidity.

So that sucked. Three games in, I hadn't eliminated a single player, and I'd been one of the first people out each time.

After that game we took a break and refilled. It was at this point that I saw Tom Hanks walk past me with a bunch of kids on their way to a private party game. So that was neat. I didn't say anything or stare, but I confess I wanted to hear him give out orders to his team in his Capt. Miller voice.

Next up we tried one of the Speed Ball fields, which are my least favorite since the guys with 15-ball-per-second electronic triggers tend to dominate and it's really close quarters. Ironically, I did my best on this field, getting two guys out in one game.

Later we tried The Graveyard, where I really noticed that our guns sucked at long-range. I did get to watch Doug take a guy out while I was on the sidelines. It was great, this guy was peaking over the edge of his trench, and Doug nailed him right on the hand or the top of his head, and paint went spewing out behind him like an exit wound.

The field I really wanted to try, the field I would have been most comfortable on, was Afghanistan. And it's the one we didn't do. It's a long woodsy field, the kind I grew up playing on. Oh well. Next time we'll insist on it.

Fun day. We may go again in a few months. And I want to at least get a decent pair of goggles before next time so I can see.

Illustration remakes for Fred, part 2

Here are a couple more commissions I finished this week.

This is a redo of this piece.


Here's a widescreen take on "Looner," which in turn was inspired by this one.


And finally, a new version of "describe it to me!". This time, the writing should mean "monkey."

Illustration remakes for Fred

A friend commissioned me to create some originals for him based on past work. (These are all potential t-shirt ideas.)

First up is another re-do of "flee!" (which you'll also recall from this post and this post). Pretty fun to draw, and I like the way the "monster" turned out. His body is a nice size and proportion.



Next up is my first ever re-do of "hug?". I still like the original a lot, but I was very happy with this one as well.


Finally, we've got my third rendition of "lost tooth." (Original here, second version here.)

Giant Size Movie Round-Up: Pt. 2

On to a second part.

Little Shop of Horrors (1986) - I rented this one after seeing a trailer at Movies On The Fox and discovering that Bill Murray and Steve Martin were in it. As a kid I was always aware of this movie's existence because of the giant talking plant image (don't know where I saw it, though). So the movie is a musical, and was apparently a stage play first, which would have been something to see. Overall, I didn't really care for it. I loved the puppetry (really impressive!), Bill Murray's scene was great, John Candy too, and it was fun seeing Christopher Guest, but the plot didn't do anything for me, and Ellen Greene's voice was excruciating. I've only seen Greene in this and "Pushing Daisies," but she has the same wilting voice and speech impediment in both. Is that just how she speaks? Or is it a deliberate character choice? As a choice, it's terrible. I had to fast-forward through all of her scenes after the first few, because it was like a mite burrowing into my brain.

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (2009) - It's ok. Has a couple of very funny moments. The inverted mohawk on Mr. T's character made me chuckle. There were some fun animation moments. The story is nothing special, so the best you can hope for are some good moments, and Cloudy delivers on that front.

Junebug (2005) - I didn't realize why this was rated R and watched it with my family, which, due to the numerous sex scenes, was a mistake. I only remembered that I had read a blog by John-Mark Reynolds a while back where he recommended it. I found that post (after some digging - Scriptorium doesn't have a friendly archive) after we'd finished it, and noted that Reynolds did caution about the sex; I just hadn't remembered that.

Anyhow, to the movie: the basic story is that a young couple is returning to the husband's hometown in North Carolina so that the wife can secure a weird and reclusive painter's work for her Chicago art gallery. The wife is an elite cosmopolitan woman with a British accent, very much out of her element in North Carolina. The husband's family includes a slacker younger brother and his pregnant wife (Amy Adams).

Adams is indeed as radiant and charming as I'd heard. I was also really impressed with Benjamin McKenzie's performance as the younger brother. Beyond the actors, the movie deserves praise for an even-handed portrayal of the people of the Carolinian community (is that the right term?). The young pastor character in the church basement was perhaps the best modern characterization of a religious figure I've ever seen in a movie. He's authentic and genuine. Every other pastor I've seen sounds really artificial; they sound like they were written by someone who'd never spent any time in a Protestant church. Like if I were to write a rabbi, or a Catholic priest.

Also worth noting is the contrast between the Southern folk and the gallery owner. Reynolds keenly observes that only a New York elite would seek out the deranged paintings for display in a high art gallery. My favorite moment came when the sister of the artist, who at first comes off as meddling and greedy, gives the art dealer a sincerely tearful and heartfelt condolence for a family loss. Not the sort of treatment you usually get in a Hollywood movie of a character with a Southern accent.

Fun note: Embeth Davidtz, who plays the gallery owner, was the princess in Army of Darkness! Despite knowing this, I cannot reconcile the fact in my mind when I picture both characters.

Overall, it's a good movie that says good things. But the sex made for a very uncomfortable viewing experience.

Axe Cop!

So my buddy Ethan posted these comics on TenNapel's forum around Christmas. They were called "Axe Cop," and he'd done them with his five-year-old brother Malachai while home visiting his family. He made them as a lark, but now it's the newest, biggest, and best thing on the internet, so I thought I'd share it with you in case you hadn't stumbled across them yet. The comics feature Ethan's excellent and hilarious drawings, and are written entirely by Malachai's brilliant child's mind. An idea so simple you wish you'd thought of it (and were as funny as the Nicolles).

Giant Size Movie Round-Up: Pt. 1

It's only been a MILLION YEARS since my last review went up, so I'm going to gather a bunch and give (probably short) thoughts on them.

Avatar (2009) - I enjoyed the spectacle and the 3-D, but the story had nothing new whatsoever, and the ham-fisted moralizing made me roll my eyes quite a bit. Even though Stephen Lang (who was Ike Clanton in Tombstone, by the way!) is great in his role as cartoon military man, every line he had was mind-numbingly bad. This guy sums it up all the problems I had, and is funnier to boot. (See also his seven-part series on The Phantom Menace. It's very insightful.) And now a Best Picture nod?? Come on!

The Big Country (1958) - This one was great. It's really really good all the way up to the final scene, where it falls a bit short. A genuinely unique Western. You've got Gregory Peck as a former ships captain who has come out west to marry the daughter of a big-time rancher. He discovers that a war has been brewing between his future father-in-law and another rancher (played by Burl Ives).

So what's unique about it? For one thing, the sea-captain angle. For another, Peck never uses a gun. Ever. (As I watched, I wanted to be Peck. He's just the coolest guy. Always in control, always knows exactly what he wants and what he's capable of, never lets himself be manipulated by anyone else.) Then you've got the rest of the supporting cast. You immediately fall in love with Jean Simmons. Burl Ives utters all the lines you always wondered about in the "Happy Happy Joy Joy" song from Ren & Stimpy. Chuck Connors plays a great sleazy weasel. And Chuck Heston is in there too! He and Peck get into a fight in the middle of the night on a dusty prairie. It lasts forever, and there's no music during the scene. And it ends in a draw. There's also the love story, which doesn't go where you'd expect. And that really goes for the rest of the movie. It's unexpected. It surprised me, and most of the time I honestly did not know where it was going to end up. Compare that to Avatar, where I called out each and every plot point before stepping into the theater. Also deserving a shout-out is Alfonso Bedoya, Peck's best buddy on the ranch. He's a great character, and it's always good to see an actual Mexican rather than Jack Palance performing such a role in an old movie.

The only weak points are the music and the final confrontation. The music is generally very good, but there are a few scenes where it is ill-suited to the mood. The final confrontation between the two barons is a bit of a let-down, mostly because it plays out exactly as you expect it to. Given everything else that has come before, I was left with a "that's it?" feeling. It's logical and serves the story, but I was hoping for one last surprise.

Final note: this needs a Blu-Ray release. I didn't at all mention the fabulous titular setting. The DVD is decent, but you could definitely see where a bit of work and a hi-definition transfer would bring the movie back to glorious new heights in a home theater setting.

Ichi (2008) - A fun take on the Zatoichi world, this time with a captivating young girl as the new blind swordsman. Not a great movie, but certainly decent. I liked the guy who couldn't draw his sword, though I found the explanation for his condition wanting. The action scenes are well-done, though they aren't in traditional Zatoichi fashion. Zatoichi's scenes were always in real-time, but Ichi slows it down. You get to enjoy the choreography a bit more, I suppose, but there's something to be said for the long single-take action shots in the originals.

Moon (2009) - A really good little sci-fi movie. Sam Rockwell gives several great performances. The movie really makes you care about him, too, which doesn't sound significant, but I suppose that because of the ethical subject matter of the movie it hit me a bit deeper. Definitely worth watching.

Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939) - Great movie. Boy, I've been on a Capra kick lately. As you'll see below, I finally saw It's A Wonderful Life for the first time. (I know.) And I love his sentiment and morals. It's done so well.

It's A Wonderful Life (1946) - I can't believe I've been missing this my whole life. It really is one of the best movies I've seen. Such a great story, great characters, great message. This is up there on my list now.

Blog post count

Dang, 2009 was a real drop in numbers compared to the last couple of years.

2007 - 72
2008 - 95
2009 - 44

Sorry about that (unless you're grateful). We'll see how 2010 goes. I do have a huge backlog of movies to comment about.

Anyhow, happy New Year!

New Year's Eve Shooting

I was invited on a shooting trip over Christmas break by a guy from work, but since it turned out to be a three day trip I decided not to go. But I still wanted to go shooting! So I found a place in Ramona (way out, past the Wild Animal Park) called Orosco Ridge that allowed recreational shooting.

After a long drive up a winding dirt road, we came to the spot. There was no official looking designation; it was merely a rounded ridge without vegetation, sloping down into some bushes and a ravine, with another hill leading up the other side. There were several trucks at the beginning of the range, firing off all sorts of pistols, rifles, and shotguns, so we made our way to the far left side that had only one occupant. (We observed that we were the only non-truck on the ridge that day.)

Our neighbor turned out to be shooting two old cap-and-ball revolvers! He had a Starr revolver and a LeMat, both unusual guns. (See below: Starr from Unforgiven, LeMat from The Quick and the Dead.) The LeMat has a nine shot cylinder and shotgun barrel underneath the main barrel! Damon let me fire off a shot from it at the end of the day. Very cool.


We had been told at the ranger station that we were only allowed to shoot paper targets or clay pigeons, but at the ridge we found all sorts of junk. We set up some wood planks and boards that had been left there, and found a bunch of unbroken clay pigeons that we decided to chuck for each other.

The guns: my 1851 Colt Navy (videos coming soon -- they're on my brother's camera), my double-barreled shotgun, and Ian's pump shotgun. Unfortunately, like an idiot, I forgot my bag of lead balls for my Navys, so I only had the seven shots that I had left in the case. We each only got two shots. But, I did get to load up all six cylinders for the first time, which was cool.

After those shots were up, we spent the rest of the time using up all our shotgun ammunition, which was fun enough. And I took video with my Flip! The shooters: friend Ian, brother Ben, and me. You may notice I am sporting my Clint hat and new bandoleer.

Blog banner

As you can see I finally got around to making a banner image for the blog. I'll post it down below as well for posterity (in case I change it later).

Here's a different version I made using images from a page from the ol' Cowboy Monkey comic (I found the decorative accents through a Google image search):


This next image is the one, as of this post's publishing date, currently being used. This was made using drawings I did for our wedding invitations back in 2007:

Them Crooked Vultures

I had never even heard of the group until I read on a gaming site that their single was going to be released for download in Rock Band. I guess that's not too surprising, since I don't really read or follow music news. But I do try and follow news of the few bands I regularly seek out, so you'd think a band made up of Josh Homme (Queens of the Stone Age), Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters), and John Paul Jones (Led Zeppelin) would have appeared on my radar at some point since their first appearance in June 2009.

The line-up alone was enough to sell me, though I did seek out some of their songs on YouTube. I ordered it through Amazon on Tuesday and got it last night.

It's a great album. With vocals and guitar hooks provided by Homme, it's going to remind you a lot of QOTSA (which certainly isn't a bad thing), but it's unique enough to lay claim to a separate identity. I'm not good at the whole "song by song" thing, but for what it's worth, here you go:

The first song, "No One Loves Me and Neither Do I," has a very QOTSA feel to it. But the next one, "Mind Eraser, No Chaser," has a running rhythm that will evoke a Foo Fighters chorus. The single, "New Fang," is just a plain old catchy rock song. "Dead End Friends" begins with an eerie tune that I think best fits the album art. "Elephants" has a great hook and quickly ramps up into a fast-paced rocker, but then slows down into the trudging beat we know from other QOTSA songs. I wish it had maintained the initial energy throughout, though it does kick up at the end again. "Scumbag Blues" reminded me more of an easy going Led Zeppelin song. "Bandoliers" is good, and I can't really think of a good way to describe it. Towards the end an extended guitar and organ duet kicks in. "Reptiles" is Zeppelin right from the get-go. Jones' bass has an instant presence, and Homme's guitars say the same thing. Good one. "Interlude with Ludes" is what you'd expect, and it's not my favorite. Spacey drugged out song. "Warsaw..." is a bluesy, slower, grungy march. "Caligulove" features more organ and has a good skippy beat. "Gunman" has a dance-song feel that reminded me of Muse's "Supermassive Black Hole" at first, but the chorus is eerie QOTSA. "Spinning in Daffodils" reminded me of early QOTSA.

I think if you're a fan of at least 2 out of 3 of the original bands, you'll really dig this.

Paranormal Activity (2009)

A few weeks ago I went to see Paranormal Activity with a good bunch of dudes (Doug, Ethan, Will, and Hugh). We'd all heard a bunch of buzz about this being a genuinely terrifying movie without gore, so we were all excited. We saw it with a good responsive crowd, so it was a fun time.

The promotion for this movie has been designed around the idea that the less you know about the film, the better the experience, so I'm letting you know now that I'll be discussing specific content in the review below. Fair warning, go ye n'further if ye want to see the movie unspoilt.

The movie is structured like The Blair Witch Project and Cloverfield, in that it's documentary-style "found footage." The story concerns Katie and Micah (pronounced "Mee-kuh" because his parents hated him), a couple who live together in San Diego. Katie has been haunted by a spirit or presence for years, and it has returned again. Micah is a skeptic, and decides to set up a camera to try and capture the phenomena of the haunting. As it turns out, it's a demon that's been following her. And the demon wants her (for what, it's never clear). And it doesn't like being taunted, it doesn't like the camera, and it doesn't like Micah. By the end it has fully possessed Katie and killed Micah.

The movie is pretty good. I try not to give bad art a pass because it was made on a low budget, and fortunately these guys did a great job by using their limitations as strengths. The best parts of the film are the titular paranormal events, most often observed in the bedroom set-up. It begins very subtly, with a door moving and some audible foot-steps. By the end Katie is being dragged out of bed in one of the most terrifying scenes in the film. Other notable scenes include the appearance of three-toed demon footprints in baby powder that Micah has spread around, an Ouija board that moves by an unseen hand and then bursts into flame, and a shadow moving across a door. Each time the demon is present, the audio turns low and bassy, and it's a great effect for giving the sense of an evil oppressive presence.

The stuff I didn't like was all the relationship drama. I understand the need for it for the story structure, but it was mostly boring, and, at its worst, unbelievable. It's understandable that Micah would scoff at and taunt the demon in the beginning when he doubts its existence, but it's beyond stupid that he would say, "No one messes with my girl; I'll take care of it" when he believes it exists. And "I'll take care of it" seems to mean doing nothing other than more bro-posturing.

Which leads me to the biggest hole in the film. No one, at any point, decides to consult an exorcist. Or at least some religious figure. If you're convinced and terrified that there is an evil demon tormenting you, I don't care if you're Richard Dawkins, you're going to consult someone or something on the "good" side to try and protect yourself. As an American in 2009, you're aware of the pop-culture surrounding demon mythology. Everyone's heard of The Exorcist. Everyone knows the idea of God vs. the Devil, angels vs. demons, good vs. evil. So the fact that there's not one mention of God, Jesus, angels, whatever, is unbelievable. Not as a Christian, but as a movie-goer. It's odd, too, since the movie does a good job of addressing our other concerns (like why don't they just leave the house).

Last complaint: CG demon face at the end was stupid. When the rest of your movie is made up of practical, believable effects, don't suddenly end it the way a cookie-cutter horror movie would with a distractingly obvious demon face biting the screen black.

The movie is an impressive demonstration of making something genuinely affective without any money. While it didn't shake me to my core, it provided a few good scares and a good sense of atmosphere. Worth a rent.

More bad Western art - Outlaw Territory

I've been meaning to write about this for a while now, but finding these images online (saving me the trouble of scanning them from the book) made it easier.

I bought Outlaw Territory, a Western comics anthology, earlier this year. The cover was pretty cool and I had hopes that there would be at least a few good stories or some sweet art to make the purchase worthwhile (I know anthologies like Flight, Gunned Down, and Marvel Westerns well enough to know that you're guaranteed some stinkers). Unfortunately, there were only 2-3 contributions that I can think of that were any good. Most of them were, at best, boring and uninspired, and at worst, full of terrible art.

The selection below (from First Car in Mexico, by Andy Macdonald and Daniel Heard) is by no means the worst. In fact, it's actually pretty good! Nice lay-out, colors, and drawings. Except for -- say it with me now -- the guns.

****

Those are the weirdest banana guns I've ever seen. And they're so detailed that you'd swear the guy wasn't making them up! He doesn't fudge the design behind weak renderings like Phil Noto. But trust me, he is pulling those out of his butt. There's never been a revolver with a grip like he's got going on there. As you'll recall, I don't mind invented guns if they look somewhat close to reality (i.e. the artist knows what the appropriate guns look like and bases his invention on logical principles). But those handles . . . ! The weird thing is, he apparently knew enough to draw a loading lever underneath the barrel in the top panel, which would be appropriate for a black powder revolver. Maybe he only had half a picture for reference? From mid-cylinder on? Because everything from that point back is wacky. And then in the second-to-last panel he doesn't keep his gun anatomy consistent at all. He's confident in his invention, hoping that they look like real guns to his audience. But I'll bet you he'd laugh out loud and smack his forehead if you showed him a real revolver (from any point in history, really).

Here's a different example (Gut Shot by David Miller and Philip Fuller). The rendering isn't bad in this one. Bland, but fine. But the coloring kills it. It looks like the colorist discovered the bloom effect and decided every single panel should have it. Honestly, look at it! Every panel. Someone hide the lens flare from these kids before things get worse.

****

This next one (Griswold's Song by Ming Doyle) is an odd duck in that the gun was obviously referenced. It has a weird added-on panel where the barrel meets the cylinder (should be one piece), but the rest of the anatomy is fine. But the way everything is rendered is so squirrelly and ugly as to ruin it. Also, check out his hand in the bottom panel. Aside from being ugly, it's position relative to the gun makes it appear as though the grip is, once again, extending straight down underneath the hammer. Bad, dude! How could you do that if you had reference of the real thing for the rest of it?

****

This page isn't the worst of this entry (The Bounty Killers by John Cboins and Shannon Eric Denton) , but it does at least show the illustrator's failed attempt at a Kent Williams-ish style. There are some really wonky faces in some of the other pages. It also tries to convince me that you only need to draw backgrounds in the establishing-shot panel. Sorry, pal, you can get away with that a bit when you're doing dialogue, but when it's an action scene, and you have a lot of negative space in the second panel, it's obvious and amateurish. Filling it with color doesn't fix it.

****

I constructed this post using only the examples from the blog. Eventually I'll scan some of the really bad stuff to show you. The worst one of all will astonish you with its badness. Like, bad for the internet, let alone a published book.

Recent movies - Bad Company, The Outlaw Josey Wales, Gunga Din

Bad Company (1972) - Odd little "Western" featuring a very young Jeff Bridges as Jake Rumsey. Rented based on Nate Bell's recommendation via Netflix. It's about a straight-laced and up-tight kid named Drew who is dodging the Civil War draft and ends up in the company of Jake and several other dodger kids. The gang wants to make its way west, and intends to fund the expedition by robbing anyone it can.

While peppered with humor, Bad Company is also memorable for its dark and violent moments. When they try to steal chickens from a farmhouse at one point, the youngest kid in their gang is shot and killed. The camera pauses for a solemn moment on his tiny lifeless body before returning to the escape. It is a hard scene to watch. There is an equally violent but less emotionally damaging scene later when Jake and Drew take on a inexperienced but cruel gang of older gunslingers -- and win! I found myself cheering for the kids because it's such an unexpected turn but it's actually believable. It's a great action scene; written, staged, and executed nicely. Below is a shot from the end of the fight. The guy is plugging up his neck wound with his finger! Gross, dude. It's not played for sympathy; he's soon dispatched and we're still riding the high of triumph that the kids have had over these guys.

David Huddleston stands out as a gunslinger named Big Joe who turns up in several scenes mentoring the aforementioned older gang. One of the funnier moments is the first meeting between the two gangs as he supervises the older robbing the younger with helpful coaching. The scene ends on a memorable moment as Jake attempts to draw on him and we see how fast Big Joe is. Later, when Joe is caught by a US Marshal, there's a great scene where Joe is allowed to demonstrate his gun handling prowess to the younger deputies. It's a somber scene, as the Marshal and Joe know that the long relationship between them will finally end in the morning with a hanging. (Ironically, Jake gets in trouble because he wants to be more like Big Joe -- 25 years later we saw Bridges trying the opposite in The Big Lebowski.)

Bad Company is a movie with an odd feel. The relationship between Drew and Jake is the thing that drives the movie. It works pretty well, but I found myself interested more often in the ancillary stuff (as you can see in my "review," where the relationship is hardly mentioned). Jake is a fascinating character to watch, but Drew annoyed me, so it was tough to root for him.

Quick note on the guns: the movie is set during the Civil War era, and the guns are entirely anachronistic.  As you can see on the cover below, both boys carry Colt Single Action Armys, which were first patented in 1873.  This is common in pre-1960 Westerns, but not for a movie as late as 1972, and I suspect the director just didn't care about that aspect, as his armorers would surely have warned him of the error.  Metallic cartridge firing pistols are easier to deal with on a set, and he probably thought most of his audience wouldn't notice the error.

One last thing: I love Bridges' look on the DVD cover. I want to steal the costuming and color for one of my characters. It's very simple, but it's such a cool look. It misleads you about the actual movie, but on its own it's awesome.
The Outlaw Josey Wales (1976) - Hadn't seen this one since becoming a gun nob, so decided to check it out again. I remember not really caring one way or another about it when I first saw it, but upon revisiting it, it's moved up in my list. A big reason for that is Chief Dan George's portrayal of Lone Watie. He's such a great character. Watching the making-of doc, Eastwood notes how he wanted to feature Native American characters who weren't simply stoic sages or angry savages. Lone Watie is such a funny guy, and the relationship he has with Josey makes the movie for me. There is also plenty of help from a fine supporting cast.

Gun-wise, how could I not love a scarred hero who carries dual Colt Walkers? Everyone's seen the iconic image of Clint wielding those two massive pistols. (In fact, there are several different such images, each of them famous.) This capture demonstrates the scale:

Later in the movie, he carries four pistols on him at a time. Love that. The scene towards the end where he advances on the villian dry-firing all his pistols is brilliant stuff.


One of my favorite scenes in the movie (featuring the beautiful Geraldine Keams):

"Only an Indian can do that."

Another favorite moment that uses the whole movie to build to the punchline: Josey spits tobacco everywhere throughout the movie. Probably spits 15 times or more. Usually to show his contempt for something or someone. He spits on this poor dog three or four times. Towards the end, when he's in the old woman's house, he goes to spit, but catches the old woman's eye, so he swallows it.

Gunga Din (1939) - Fun adventure movie. A young Cary Grant is a bit over the top with his goofy shtick and not-quite-believable accent. When it starts it takes you in several. It goes from Indian assassins killing Brits to a slap-stick bar-room brawl to talk of a treasure to a man's special relationship with an elephant. Finally it decides to be about war buddies who don't want their friend to get married, so they hook him into a rescue attempt where they will fight a horde of Thuggee death cult members (yes, the same Thuggees found in Temple of Doom). Oh, and Gunga Din? He's the water bearer who tags along with dreams of being a British soldier. Yep.

The fights in this movie are something special. Unlike other fake looking fights from this era, these are convincing and impressively choreographed.

The Hurley Pro

A few years back brother Josh joined me at the San Diego Comic Con for a day. While he enjoyed himself, for him it was a glimpse into an alien world. I could identify most of the "celebrities" there; I geeked out if I saw Jeff Smith or Mike Mignola walking by.

Last Saturday I experienced the inverse when I accompanied Josh to the final day of the Hurley Pro being held at Trestles in San Clemente (right on the border of San Onofre -- check out the power plant in the background of the picture below for reference).

We got there at about 8:30, but had to park a few miles away and take a shuttle over. It's not the easiest beach to get to to begin with, but it was an absolute zoo because of the contest. We got there in time to see the tail end of Taylor Knox's heat against Roy Powers. Knox (pictured below) is an alum of Carlsbad High School, so naturally we were cheering for him. He won the heat, but the waves weren't very consistent in the morning, so it was a lot of waiting around. Josh geeked out frequently by identifying surfers and industry people walking around us. Apparently brother Ben (who missed it because he was -- wait for it -- surfing) is an even bigger surf nerd and would have been able to point out a lot more. They were also handing out free swag from time to time, another similarity to Comic Con.

We stayed for two more heats, first Dane Reynolds (pictured below) vs. Rob Machado (I actually know who they are!), then Kelly Slater vs. Kekoa Bacalso (heard of Slater, of course). Reynolds vs. Machado actually had to get restarted 10 minutes in because neither one caught a wave. It was really boring at the beginning. When waves finally did come through, it was pretty fun to watch. It was my first time seeing pro surfers do their thing live, and the waves weren't breaking that far out from the beach, so we had a pretty good view of the show.

After the Slater heat, we went surfing ourselves at "Uppers," north of the contest spot. I've only surfed Trestles twice before, it's a world-reknowned spot, and there was a pretty big line-up already out there, so I was nervous about going out. But it turns out there were more newbs than veterans out there, so I had nothing to worry about. I rode Ben's single-fin and had a great time.

Later we got out and went back down to the contest to see the quarter finals. I think we got to see Knox vs. Reynolds first. The waves had picked up, so it was an exciting match, very fun to watch. We stayed through Slater's next heat too, also good, and then took off, watching the rest live on the internet.

It was a fun day, and I loved being the lesser nerd for once.

(All the photos are from Hurley's website.)

No Name on the Bullet (1959)

This is a pretty good little Western that I'd love to see remade (or remake myself, in comic form). The title and premise are fantastic. Very simple, but ripe with promise. A known assassin-for-hire, John Gant (played by real life war hero Audie Murphy), arrives in town and checks into the hotel. Everyone has heard of him, but no one knows who he's there to kill. His method is also known: he provokes his target into a fight and then kills him in "self-defense," so he gets away with it legally. Gant plays it cool for several days, allowing the more tightly-wound members of the town to self-destruct under their own hidden guilt. He befriends the town doctor named Luke (Gant reflects on the Biblical reference to the apostle/physician) before Luke learns who he is.

The build-up is handled pretty well. The seedier residents immediately begin to panic and conspire against each other and Gant. None of them are particularly memorable characters, but they ratchet up the tension and provide a few great scenes when they each face Gant. The most memorable is when a tall, skinny, wife-stealing gambler gets drunk and confronts the seated assassin. Gant calmly prods him, even placing his palms flat on the table. "All right. If you think you can do it, go ahead and try. My hands are on the table. I couldn't possibly outdraw you. So go ahead and shoot."

Another stand-out scene features Gant facing down a large posse determined to kill him or drive him out of town. "There are many of you. Yes, you could kill me. If you're willing enough. But it's only fair to tell you that I'll kill you, Stricker. And you, Dutch Henry. The physician. His father. And there might even be time for you, storekeeper." The scene has been played out many times since then, most memorably for me in Tombstone, and while I don't know if No Name on the Bullet was the first to use this scene, it's certainly one of the most potent uses. (Warlock had a similar scene, and is also from 1959, by chance.)

Save for Murphy (and maybe Edgar Stehli as Judge Benson), the performances are mostly adequate. They do the job, they're certainly not bad, but they're nothing special, either. I'd like to see some stronger character actors filling the supporting roles in a remake, and a more interesting actor playing Luke. (The most interesting parts with Luke are always Gant's reaction to him rather than Luke himself.) Murphy as Gant captivated me, however. I don't think all of that was because of his talent, however. While he certainly plays his role well, with a Death-like calm and serenity, I had recently devoured his Wikipedia entry and was in awe knowing that this baby-faced actor was one of the most decorated soldiers in history*. It was hard to divorce the man from the part while watching him.

The dichotomy between the killer and the healer is perhaps a little too obvious, but it works here. Some of the dialogue from Luke is a little on-the-nose, and I longed for a more interestingly written character, but Gant's dialogue is pretty good. He has some really good lines and only a few clunkers. (Anytime he makes medical jokes to Luke, like "that's your prescription doc... fill it," I groaned.)

With a length of just 77 minutes, this is a decent Western with a few exceptional elements that are worth your time.


*Seriously, read it. It's fascinating. That guy kicked a lot of Nazi asses. They even made a movie about it; Audie played himself. That one is coming soon in the queue.

Unflattering snap-shot

While perusing DVDBeaver's review of Monsters vs. Aliens today, I came across the screen capture below. I still haven't seen the movie (it's in the queue and I'm looking forward to it!), but even during the trailers, the design of the humans bothered me. I liked the creature designs quite a bit, but the people looked weird. The guys' faces were oddly lumpy, and the women looked too similar to each other and to other CG designs I've seen. This particular screenshot, though, is particularly unflattering. It looks as though a 3D model was made based on a 2D drawing that didn't quite translate into an appealing puppet when viewed at all angles.

I think the eyes are the worst part, but the mouths and jawlines are funky too. Look at the mouth of the woman on the far left. With the way that the teeth are visible it just looks incorrect. Like I drew it, not understanding bone structure and anatomy well enough to bluff it. I know they're stylized, but it seems like you'd want to make sure the stylization didn't hurt the aesthetic functionality of the model before you approved the design.

I've noticed this with other CG films, but this screenshot really brought the issue into focus. Anyhow, still looking forward to the movie. I've heard it's a hoot and a half.

Family Brag: Surfing

I may have mentioned here before that my brothers are great surfers, but I just discovered that, as of this weekend, there is finally a qualitative measurement that will prove it.

Josh participated in a fund-raising surf contest last Saturday and took 2nd! He got a giant trophy and everything. I think he said there were about 30 contestants. The guy that took 1st also got 1st last year, and his name was "Lance," which fits in perfectly with Josh's dream of being in North Shore (the bad guy in the movie, played by surfing legend Laird Hamilton, was also named Lance). The funds were raised for a Mormon scout troop, I believe, which doesn't fit in quite as well with the North Shore narrative.

Anyhow, thought that was cool.