Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Juggalos are dumb

News story

How does a sub-culture emerge based on one super-gay "band"? Ok, goths are dumb, and we don't get why people become goths either, but at least they come from an entire genre of music. Same for emo-kids and hipsters and what-not. It's not an uncommon thing. However, "Juggalos" and "Juggalettes" are people who identify themselves as fans of the band Insane Clown Posse. And that's it. One band. One band no one, outside of these Juggalopes (as the species is called), likes. You're either a Juggalope or you have never heard of the band or you have and think they're retarded. How did this culture come about? What itch does ICP scratch? Surely the music is not the only draw. It cannot be.

A perusal of the Wikipedia entry for "Juggalo" also notes that members of this group are devoted to the soft-drink "Faygo." I ain't got the words.

After reading more about this culture it makes sense that the fans are so devoted. You'd have to embrace it entirely in order to be able to say with a straight face, "Yes, I am a fan of a group called Insane Clown Posse lead by a man with face-paint named Shaggy 2 Dope." There's no half-hearting a love like that. You have to go all in. With enthusiasm.

And now, pictures! For who can argue with ridiculous pictures?

Or, holy carp, just read these entries!

Coupla winners:
juggaloshadow420 - "my ax is my buddy. ilove faygo. im gothik and listen to shit that u never heard of. all kinds of musik are cool wit me. i write. and we all need to get togeather and take all the haters outta here."
I would love to join you in getting rid of all the haters once and for all. Fred Durst never finished the job.

misshardhat - "Even Moms can get down with the wicked clowns! Yeah I'm a mom of a Juggalo and can hit this shit pretty f* hard myself. Been there since the Ringmaster & haven't left. Hope to see ya round"
Hey, a cool mom! My mom never supported my hobbies.

Jim Grimm - "what up pittsburgh juggalos and juggalettes!! i'm 20 years old and i live im mckees rocks, about 5 mins from downtown pittsburgh. I have 5 piercings(2 in tounge, 1 in lip, both nipples) and 2 tat's(hatchet man on chest and SV on right forearm.)"
Well dang, I had absolutely no interest until I learned of his ICP dedication through piercings and "tat's."

Lauren - "Wud up, Imma juggalette from Pittsburgh. I been down for 9 years, n LIVE, BREATHE, N DIE fo da hatchet. I'm 5'7'', n all that fun shit. I'm pretty chill, love goin to concerts, and hangin wit da juggalo fam. So hit me up! MMFWCL! Keep it wikid!"
What's fun about being 5'7"? I hated being 5'7".

nastynate42o - "im nasty nate im from harmarvill if you know anyoen from harmar that goes by nasty nate it is me"
I did meet a guy in Harmarvill named Nasty Nate, and I have been wondering if it was this Nasty Nate from Harmar, and apparently it was. It's nice to have that mystery solved.

Billy - "I want local Insane Clown Posse Meetups because i want to tell them what i think of them i fuckin hate you icp u bitches eminem is way better"
Clearly Billy is one of the aforementioned "haters." We need to get rid of him. Eminem totally dissed Fred Durst in that one song, and if I understand my Juggalo mythology correctly, Fred Durst is the Godfather of the Juggalo Movement. At least, that's what you should tell anyone with an ICP shirt.


Ian said...

I guess i'm a Seagalo. wooo.

wud up wid it bitches! a showt out 2 mi galos n galetes, 1999 baby! representin' the 670 mufugahs!

man, i can't even write as stupid as them even if i tried.

Ryan said...

Hahaha, good show of it, though.

You and Matt are WoWgalos.

"Uber pwnage, bits!"

Anonymous said...

hey fuck you bitch


hey you s are some fucking lil fagots you should just go chill with a dick in your mouth you keep on talking your shit about ICP who is makeing way more money than you what did you try to be a fucking person in the music industry and didnt make it or something stop hateing on them cuz you didnt make it

Anonymous said...

you can't honestly beleive that all jusggalos and juggaletts are stupid, which is what you are implying. I am a juggalett from mesa AZ and i am not in any way shape or form stupid. That's like saying everyone who listens to the used is emo and slits their wrists. Just making that statement makes you look ignorant which in all reality you are incredibally ignorant when it comes to icp. Shaggy is not the leader, it's not just about icp it's about everything psychopathic, which i'm assuming you don't know what psychopathic means, it is the record label that icp and all the other bands that go along with them belong to. And the clowns were around long before fred durst showed his doofy looking face on the music scene so there is no way in hell that he could even dream to claim to start the icp " movement" as you so dubbed it. And if you wanted to sound smart when you where writing all of this shit down you would have done a little more research on the subject or even went outside , no matter where you live, and asked someone wearing a hatchet man around their neck what they had to say about the matter. You said that the gothics atleast had a certain type of music that they listen to . .. well so do we . . .we listen to psychopathic shit and anything else we like. I'm not trying to talk shit i'm just saying that you have it all wrong . . .so very very wrong.

Anonymous said...

u r 1 of the stupides muthafuckas i no. all juggalos r stupid?? thats like saying all jews r stupid or all blacks r stupid. its just a dumb thing to say, especialy since if any juggalos met u, the y woud fuck u up. also im not sure if ur joking or wut but fred durst is not even in icp im prety sure hes like the singer of limp biskit or somethin dumfuck. MUCH CLOWN LOVE JUGGALOS REP THA HATCHET FUCK ALL HATERS,JUGGAHOES AND JUFFALOS!!! AND FUCK FEMINEM LUVERS

Anonymous said...

you fuckin bitch u dont know what ur talkin about. The wicked shit will never die.We all family we support each other we don't hate no one unless they hate us so why the fuck do u feel like drawing attention. I mean really music controls everyone these days.So who the fuck cares if we love a music so much we're dedicated to it.Really come on look at it from one of view and get a fuckin life.

Kristen said...

First, I would like to say that you know absolutely nothing about Juggalos. WE are a grop of people with the same beliefs about life and the ignorant ppl in it. I am a proud juggalette. As a matter of fact, you wanna call us all stupid. I made some wrong choices and got pregnant at 15 but I graduated high school a year early, I am in college studying to become a Nuclear Medicine Technologist. My sons father and I are married have our own place are nothing like you are describing. I also no plenty of juggalos n juggalettes who are doing just as well if not better. We don't only listen to ICP we listen to many other groups too. We probably listen to alot of the stuff you do as well. Being a juggalo is not about the music or the face paint. It is about how we look at life. How we have decided we do not need to impress jerks like you, we dont have to have the cool clothes. We belong to a loyal family, where we can walk up to a complete stranger thats a juggalo and talk to them like we have known them forever becuase we can relate to eachother. We are not jugdemental and we give ppl chances unlike you do. Before you talk shit why don't you look up everything completely.. Also, is your life so boring that you feel the need to bash ppl you dont no a thing about just to make you feel good?? Try asking people what they are all about b4 JUDGING...
mmfwcl to all the family...

Ryan said...

Holy Hanoi, I missed all this! How did you guys all find me? This is great! Do any of you check this blog anymore?